Thursday, March 25, 2010

I am Wonder

This is PART SIX of a series. To start from the beginning, go here.

This is an excerpt from The Deep Water Leaf Society: Harnessing the Transformative Power of Grief (copyright 2008, Claire M. Perkins. All Rights Reserved.)

from chapter 13: Voices from the Big Wave

I am highlighting one of these dialogues in each post of this series. The questions of the dominant hand are noted (DH) and the answers of the images, transcribed by my non-dominant hand, are noted (NDH).)



5/24/04 Dialogue with Blond Baby Girl

Me (DH): Hello little blond girl peeking out at me. What is your name?

Girl (NDH): Wonder.

(DH): Hello, Wonder. How do you feel?

(NDH): Alive. Happy. Curious. Excited. Inspired.

(DH): Why do you feel that way?

(NDH): Just look and see! It’s all around us. It sparkles. It sings. It’s magic.

(DH): What is this that sparkles and sings with magic?

(NDH): LIFE! All of it. It’s awesome.

(DH): What can I do for you?

(NDH): See through my eyes.

(DH): What gift or wisdom do you bring to me?

(NDH): JOY!

This little one seemed to be telling me that if I looked at life with the innocence and wonder of a child, I could reclaim joy. She seemed to promise that life could still be worth living and could still be full of joy and wonder, despite the loss I had suffered. Although right now my heart felt shattered and broken, I could feel her promise singing through my veins.
~~

to be continued . . .

As always, I welcome your comments here or by email (Claire@DeepWaterLeafSociety.com)

Visit my website: www.DeepWaterLeafSociety.com

Sunday, March 14, 2010

I am the Love that Heals All Wounds

This is PART FIVE of a series. To start from the beginning, go here.

This is an excerpt from The Deep Water Leaf Society: Harnessing the Transformative Power of Grief (copyright 2008, Claire M. Perkins. All Rights Reserved.)

from chapter 13: Voices from the Big Wave

I am highlighting one of these dialogues in each post of this series. The questions of the dominant hand are noted (DH) and the answers of the images, transcribed by my non-dominant hand, are noted (NDH).)



5/24/04 Dialogue with Broken-Winged Angel

Me (DH): Hello little broken-winged angel. What is your name?

Angel (NDH): Grace.

(DH): Hello, Grace, tell me about you.

(NDH): I am the love that heals all wounds. Even in my own brokenness my light shines through. I am perfect in my imperfection. The imperfection is an illusion. The truth is the glow in my heart.

(DH): How do you feel, Grace?

(NDH): Open and innocent.

(DH): Why do you feel that way?

(NDH): Because it is the truth of me.

(DH): What can I do for you?

(NDH): Accept.

(DH): What gift or wisdom do you bring to me?

(NDH): My own true self. Grace.

Again, the message was about the healing power of love and the illusion of brokenness. Something about her name, Grace, moved me. I understood grace to mean unlimited blessings without strings attached and no striving required. Grace was the generosity of God or the Universe, abundant gifts granted out of sheer love and having nothing to do with guilt or innocence or deservingness. It reminded me of the feeling I had after the Padre Pio dream, when Cameron was granted such a generous plea agreement. Grace was asking me to accept that there was a perfection beyond the appearance of things. She was helping me to reconnect to that part of me that had always known that was true.
~~

to be continued . . .


As always, I welcome your comments here or by email (Claire@DeepWaterLeafSociety.com)

Visit my website: www.DeepWaterLeafSociety.com

Friday, March 5, 2010

I am the Wiz Kid

This is PART FOUR of a series. To start from the beginning, go here.

This is an excerpt from The Deep Water Leaf Society: Harnessing the Transformative Power of Grief (copyright 2008, Claire M. Perkins. All Rights Reserved.)

from chapter 13: Voices from the Big Wave

(I am highlighting one of these dialogues in each post of this series. The questions of the dominant hand are noted (DH) and the answers of the images, transcribed by my non-dominant hand, are noted (NDH).)



5/24/04 Dialogue with the Boy in Blue

Me (DH): Hello little boy in blue – who are you?

Boy (NDH): I am the Wiz Kid.

(DH): Hello, Wiz Kid. What is it you are up to?

(NDH): Magic. Alchemy. Transformation.

(DH): I see. That sounds exciting! How do you feel?

(NDH): Anticipation.

(DH): Anticipation? What is it you expect?

(NDH): Great things. Growth.

(DH): It looks to me like you are feeding something to the swimmers in the bowl. What is it?

(NDH): Wisdom in small doses. Only what can be handled at any given time.

(DH): And who are the swimmers?

(NDH): Look. There are 3.

(DH): Yes, there are 3. Is one of them me?

(NDH): At least one, yes. At least.

(DH): Are they all me, then?

(NDH): All you – all me – all one.

(DH): You are very cryptic – mysterious. What can I do for you?

(NDH): Play the game. Dance, laugh, grow.

(DH): What gift or wisdom do you bring to me?

(NDH): Vision.

This dialogue left me puzzled and curious. Through the image of the Wiz Kid and the words he said, I felt connected to the side of Cameron that was always so curious and creative, the side of him that somehow seemed to know more than I did despite all appearances to the contrary. I felt uplifted by the idea that some powerful transformation was just around the corner for me. The three swimmers in the bowl had made me think of the karmic triangle that Cameron, David and I had always seemed to form, so I was surprised that the meaning was deeper and more mysterious than that. The dialogue reminded me that I could keep living and growing and enjoying life, and that this loss could lead to wisdom and vision if I allowed it to.
~~

to be continued . . .

As always, I welcome your comments here or by email (Claire@DeepWaterLeafSociety.com)

Visit my website: www.DeepWaterLeafSociety.com